Sometimes what you remember is their voices again,
coming on inside you like strung lights in your blood,
certain words they’d tongue differently
from anyone else, or your own name
and its surprisingly infinite nuances.
And sometimes you remember their hands,
not touching you but draped over a steering wheel
or cupped briefly around a cigarette,
anywhere you could watch them
in their life apart from you, knowing how
they’d find you later, blind but sure,
and come to rest where you needed them.
You remember the hardness of their bellies,
the soft line of hair that swirls down
toward the cock, the look of each one
that entered you and then withdrew, or lay
quietly inside awhile longer before slipping
away like a girl sneaking out in the middle
of the night, high heels dangling from one hand
as her stockinged feet drew sparks from the rug.
Sometimes you wander the house all day,
the fog outside stalled at the tops
of trees, refusing to rise higher and reveal
the world you hope is still there, the one
in which you’re still a woman
some beautiful man might helplessly
move toward. And you remember how one
looked at you the first time you undressed,
how another didn’t mind that you cried.
Sometimes it’s enough just to say
their names like a rosary, ordinary names
linked by nothing but the fact
that they belong to men who loved you. And finally
you depend on that, you pray it’s enough
to last, if it has to, the rest of your life.

Kim Addonizio, “Getting Older”
  1. belispeakkk likes this
  2. zwanzigequinox likes this
  3. mirandaaaaaa likes this
  4. nequams likes this
  5. boozeandbarbiturates reblogged this from fleurishes
  6. curation-spiration reblogged this from mielodis
  7. mielodis reblogged this from jesuisuneamesolitaire
  8. estebhanzeck reblogged this from savethelinoleum
  9. thinpossiblility reblogged this from savethelinoleum
  10. savethelinoleum reblogged this from fleurishes
  11. mielodis likes this
  12. chasingthesheepman likes this
  13. irandeckard likes this
  14. if-only-as-a-ghost likes this
  15. jesuisuneamesolitaire reblogged this from fleurishes
  16. jesuisuneamesolitaire likes this
  17. meetmeonmemorylane likes this
  18. dreamsoncrutches reblogged this from duneslovestunes
  19. stars-came-falling reblogged this from nocturnal--emissions
  20. withinaframe likes this
  21. nocturnal--emissions reblogged this from duneslovestunes
  22. duneslovestunes reblogged this from fleurishes
  23. amanforallseasons reblogged this from savethelinoleum
  24. merrymocking likes this
  25. julieannaglover likes this
  26. whenwemet likes this
  27. meringue-tie reblogged this from fleurishes
  28. hoovesandhorns likes this
  29. petermcwilliamsunderstudy likes this
  30. d0wntownbattle likes this
  31. cassiopeia likes this
  32. aglassofblue likes this
  33. atidae likes this
  34. emberhills likes this
  35. jeleveux reblogged this from fleurishes
  36. mean--while likes this
  37. akaamey likes this
  38. joeybuns likes this
  39. ad-sidera-caeli likes this
  40. mariakristinna reblogged this from mfna
  41. mfna reblogged this from fcknsrs
  42. unefilleetincelante reblogged this from leavesofleather
  43. aclrs likes this
  44. somethings-last reblogged this from fleurishes
  45. strawberrytelle likes this